


MallekWeek2020 Writing Prompts

by HeuristicallyInclined



Category: Hiveswap, Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Multi, Other, Prompt Fic, Temporary Character Death, mallek week, mallek week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:02:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22981435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeuristicallyInclined/pseuds/HeuristicallyInclined
Summary: It is Mallek Week 2020 and I am here for my boy.
Relationships: Mallek Adalov/MSPA Reader, Mallek Adalov/Reader
Comments: 49
Kudos: 108





	1. Day 1: What happened after Mallek's Friendsim route

**Author's Note:**

> This can be read platonically or otherwise. Have fun.

If someone told you you would be spending your evening on the less dirty side of a couch belonging to a guy who genuinely thought you were a robot when he met you, you probably would have absolutely believed it. Honestly, you might have felt some relief knowing you would get a break from the usual life-threatening antics. Things might have started out weird, but chilling on someone’s couch was a nice change of pace. Even if there is a giant snake staring at you from across the room, seemingly unblinking. Can snakes blink? Do alien snakes blink? You don’t think this one does at least. You hope Mallek comes back soon. 

The two of you had gone for a dip in some sewer water, willingly and otherwise, and had come back up to his apartment to get cleaned up. He offered to let you shower first since he did push you. You let him know you weren’t holding a grudge or anything, but he insisted. You did get a much needed change of clothes out of it though, so that was nice. You offered to see yourself out after your shower, not wanting to overstay your welcome, but he said it was cool. You are now wondering if he was just saying that to be polite. You mean, other people haven’t had much of a problem telling you to fuck off, but you think you are really feeling a friendship from him and you don’t want to risk it losing it because you can’t take a hint. You guess it is too late now, since while you were weighing your option, he enters the room. 

Mallek plops down next to you on the couch and you look up at him and give him a friendly smile. You thank him again for being cool about the whole robot and palmhusk in the water thing, but he stops you.

“dude; its cool; you already apologized; were good;” 

You relax a bit more at the reaffirmation. People have done worse for less and he felt bad enough to make it up to you. Maybe you are just waiting for the other shoe to drop?

“anyways; im hungry and am getting delivery; what do you want;”

Wait you’re getting fed? Oh he doesn’t have to do that and you don’t have anything to chip in right now an-

“i didnt really expect you to have money; im buying;”

You don’t have to do that, you’re good, you even ate today!

He shoots you a look of concern. Maybe you saying it like that was less than reassuring that you’re “good.”

“im not just going to eat in front of you; come on; plus my original plans fell through;”

You’re about to ask what when he nudges you with an easygoing smile. Oh, he was probably hoping to mess with a robot.

“here; what sounds good to you; i pulled up grubhub;”

What. 

“oh yeah you = alien; you can get food off of it; here;”

He shows you his palmhusk and you scoot closer to see the screen. What the actual fuck. How is this a universal constant? Like you know they have a kind of bug theme going on and slap the word grub on things in ways you don’t really get. This still is a lot for you though. He is explaining it to you and you stop him. You fill him in. He chuckles and seems to be amused by this.

“that = weird dude; how about the food;”

Nope, the food is still eluding you. Some stuff seems to have Earthen equivalents and just have bugs or grubs on them or something. Others you have no idea what to make of. He can get whatever he thinks is good and you’re cool with getting whatever he is gets. He puts an order in.

“sure; but grubs = the best part;”

You disagree.

He laughs, “dibs on yours then;”

They’re all his. 

You smile at him and it feels easy to do. You ask what you two are doing until then.

“how about a movie; = you cool with that”

Sure!

Okay, you are actually really pumped about this. A movie night with some delivery? That sounds like a really fun night. This is something actually you want to do, instead of just getting through to try to be his friend. You tell him to choose whatever, you haven’t seen anything other than a few romcoms anyways. Plus, him asking you to choose between two movies would take him ten minutes just to get through the titles. He chuckles at this and starts flipping through titles.

“do you like action movies;”

Yeah.

“how about bad ones;”

Like a really cheesy movie?

“yeah;”

Sounds fun. But you haven’t seen a lot of Alternian media, so whatever he picks is going to inform your opinion of his species. No pressure.

You hope he gets that this is a joke. Joking has felt easy to do with him so far and you want to keep doing it. You would hate to ruin it by saying the wrong thing and having him tell you to get out. By the way he is laughing though, he seems to appreciate it.

He grins at you, “okay; then this is going to be accurate as hell; enjoy;” 

You’re ready for it.

Except you aren’t because there is a knock on the door. Mallek starts to get up, but you tell him you can at least grab it for him since he ordered it. You bound up to the door and open it with a delivery guy reading off the order for you to confirm. You realize you don’t know what Mallek ordered and the delivery guy looks up when you don’t answer. You also then realize he wasn’t expecting to see an alien answering a highblood’s door, based off of how he was looking at you. To his credit, he doesn’t drop the food. You just just grab it and thank him, basically slamming the door in his face with mild panic. You turn around and Mallek is there. You two look at each other and he doubles over. His laughter is contagious and soon you are too. You eventually collect yourself.

You feel bad, you know the poor guy doesn’t get paid enough for that.

“hes fine; does everyone do that when they see you;”

Depends on if they’re looking for a robot or not.

He chuckles and shakes his head. You settle back onto the couch with him with some plates and pop the box open. You see what looks like a very creative interpretation of pizza covered in mostly plants. And grubs. Cool. You grab a slice and start picking them off. It tastes good, not what you were expecting, but not bad. You grab another slice. 

“how = it;” 

You let him know you like it.

“enough to try it with grubs;”

Absolutely not.

He grabs one of the ones you picked off of your plate and into his mouth, “suit yourself;”

The two of you get back to watching the movie and you get comfortable. It has so many explosions and unrealistic combat scenes. Which you feel you now have the authority to judge based off what you’ve seen with Skyyla, Remele, Konyyl, Azdaja, and wow actually this is a concerning amount of violence you’ve seen. Hope that doesn’t have any long term consequences. 

The acting is also just so bad. Like you know very little about quadrants, but based off of that and how prickly trolls can be, this is forced as hell. They have no chemistry in a love or hate way. God Polypa would be having a field day with this one. The characters are just. A lot. Some douchey main, secondary buddy dude, the veteran, romantic lead. There are so many cliches and you are having fun hating it, wait, did you just accidentally understand kissmesitude? Because of this shitty movie? Damn it. 

There is one hacker character who does tech stuff for the leads. He uses a bunch of technical sounding jargon that you suspect means nothing based off of how Mallek is rolling his eyes. You don’t feel too bad interrupting the riveting dialogue. 

So did any of that mean anything? 

“fuck no; none of that made sense;”

You continue watching it, curling up fully on the couch now. More explosions and fight scenes. You wonder if humans and trolls have more in common than you originally thought just because of how you share so many tropes, just spun a bit differently. The hacker character utters, “I’m in,” and you can’t help it and smirk. 

That’s you.

“that = me; you = right;”

This is easy and you like it, Just dumb side commentary during dumb movies. 

Seriously, have you ever hacked anything and said “I’m in”?

“no;” he pauses and smiles at you, “but i have thought it;”

You wouldn’t be a real information specialist if you didn’t. 

You grab another slice and immediately put the grubs on Mallek’s plate. The hero saves the day and triumphs doing some backflips off of a burning building. The buddy makes a joke that falls flat. The two kiss. Everyone is happy and the credits roll.

You look over at Mallek, sprawled out on the couch, legs on top of yours. He seems to always keep up a cool demeanor, but this is probably the first time you’ve seen him be genuinely relaxed. You wish you could be that relaxed, you were having fun, you really were, but the movie was over now and you didn’t know where that left you. As reluctant as you are to break the silence, you do.

So the movie is done now, do you want me to help clean up before I go?

“it = getting late; do you want to go;” 

You hope you aren’t reading too far into this but you think he maybe doesn’t want you to leave yet.

You were down to watch another one if he was.

“Sweet; i =”

You were actually having a lot of fun. 

He raises an eyebrow at you when you make this admission. 

“Actually;”

Wait, by that you me-

“im just messing with you; yeah; i havent had a movie day with friends in a while; it = nice;”

He said friend! You were beaming at him. He returned the look albeit more tiredly.

“= you ready for the next one;”

You nodded and he pressed play.


	2. Day 2: MSPA Reader sharing their hobbies with Mallek

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Make Mallek go outside challenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm surprised at how much I'm enjoying doing these little one shots.

You had been enjoying the comfortable silence between you and Mallek. You came over to hang out with him, his hive, despite the mess, was becoming very comfortable to you. You enjoyed being able to just pop in and hang out with someone without worrying about saying the wrong thing or even having to say anything. The two of you would chill while he was working on something and you came to really enjoy having a quiet place to get away from it all. You quickly came to understand why he seems to hole up in here between being so busy and well, living on Alternia. 

Even as comfortable as you were on your palmhusk, with a blanket between you and his nasty couch and the cool weight of his lusus loosely coiled around you, you felt some concern. Mallek hasn't gotten up in a few hours and alien or not, that can't be good for him. Has he even left his hive this wipe? You get his attention. 

You call his name. 

"yeah;" 

You ask him if he is getting close to wrapping up. 

"in a bit; what = up;"

Not a whole lot, you just wanted to know if he wanted to go out and do something with you. You know, get up for a bit, move around, maybe go outside. 

"dont worry about it; ive been holed up in here for way longer that this;"

That was supposed to make you worry less about him? 

He snickers. "relax; it sounds like my lusus put you up to it;" 

You glance down at Snakedad who is now looking up at you. You used to think he wasn't very expressive, but over time, you would like to think you were getting pretty good at reading him. Like right now, where you're pretty sure he is distinctly giving you a very exasperated look. This was probably a reoccurring conversation in the Adalov household.

You let him know he didn't. But if you have to start conspiring with his lusus to make him go outside, you absolutely will. 

Snakedad hisses something at Mallek. You have no idea what he said, but there was a parental tone to it. At least, you think so. Mallek groans a bit and it's kinda funny to you, no matter how wildly different Alternia is, you recognize affectionate nagging when you see it. 

"fine; i = almost done; damn; turning my own lusus against me; that = cold robobud;" He shakes his head and writes a few more lines of code before closing the window. He turns to face you and stretches, "what = it you have in mind;" 

Oh. You didn't get that far. You just didn't think that staying inside this long was great for him. 

"what = it you normally do when you = out;" 

Normally, you like going out, meeting new people, seeing new things, and rolling with wherever the night takes you. You don't really think these things through, you just kinda do them and hope for the best. 

He raises an eyebrow at you, incredulous, "that = wild; you know that right; here is not the best place for that;" 

You've survived so far. And made plenty of new friends! You're having fun between the peril. 

"there = some real freaks out there though; some shit could happen to you;" 

You know what? He's right. This one time you got abducted by an alien who brought you back to his place and wanted to put wires in you. But you think it worked out pretty well in the end. 

You nudge him, smiling. He huffs, but you know he thought it was funny. 

"fine; but im picking where we = going;" 

You're cool with that.

He smirks, "and how we get there;" 

Also cool, as long as he got some fresh air and moved around tonight you were good. 

At least, you were, you assumed he wanted to take his limo. You were very wrong. 

And that's how you ended up holding onto him for dear life as he raced through the city on his rocketboard, him laughing from excitement and maybe your reactions. When he first told you to hold onto him, you just grabbed the bottom of his hoodie. You wrapped your arms around his midsection when he told you that he didn't want to make you uncomfortable or anything, but you would go flying off if you didn't hold onto him tighter. 

He was right, especially with the speed he was going at. You were terrified but also it was starting to grow on you. It was kinda like the feeling of when you first drop down a roller-coaster, but the whole time. You eventually relax a bit, still not loosening your hold on him, but no longer burying your face in his back. Lights raced by you and the view was great if you didn't look down. Eventually, he gets you to your destination and stops. He waits a bit for you to collect yourself, peel yourself off of him, and step off. 

"was that enough movement;" 

Yeah. You think so. 

Your heart is still racing and you try to calm down by trying to focus on your surroundings. You two are at a McGrubalds. Wait. This isn't actually far from his place. Was he taking you around in circles or did it just feel like forever? You turn back to him expectantly. 

Did he decide to go the long way or something?

"it = the scenic route;" You adjust your clothes and start smoothing down your hair. "plus you would say something if you didn't think I got enough fresh air;" 

You punch his arm and he ruffles your hair, messing it up again. He starts walking in with you following close behind. The two of you get your meals and sit down in a booth further away from other people. You are enjoying some fried tuber spears when you speak up. 

So this was clearly your first time on a hoverboard. 

He gives you a shit eating grin and you continue. 

But he's clearly done this before. He doesn't really talk much about his hobbies other than tech stuff. Why is that? 

"i mean; they dont really come up;" he pops a tuber into his mouth, "plus with me going off planet soon; it = not like they matter;" He says this very offhandedly and you don't like it. 

Well, you think it matters. If it makes him happy, even if it doesn't last, it matters. A lot of what made you happy here were dumb little moments and even if maybe they were kinda pointless, it mattered to you because it made things feel worthwhile. 

He gives you a small smile, "you = getting way too deep for a McGrubalds; plus there = not much else other than hoverboarding;" 

What about the artsy stuff he likes? 

"dude what;" 

When he gets into the mood for it, he gets really into cooking. Like he cares a surprising amount for someone whose kitchen looks like a bomb went off inside of it. Also body mods. He has plenty of piercings and tattooed Galekh. He also has his own tattoos that he's designed. 

"that = not artsy; that = is just some dumb shit i do; you = giving me too much credit;" He is being dismissive, but you don't think he means it. 

You like the dumb shit he does. 

You don't want to make things too heavy, so you smile at him and quickly steal a tuber spear from him even though you still have a good amount. He steals one back in retaliation. The two of you continue eating and chatting about whatever comes to mind and he asks you more about where your friend making has taken you. He seems amused by your antics and also somewhat surprised you're alive. Ha, yeah, you too. 

The two of you are wrapping up when you ask him if he had fun going out. 

"yeah; it was a nice change of pace;" He leans back in his seat and smiles, "so = you ready to take the scenic route again;" 

You throw a tuber spear at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come back for day three.


	3. Day 3: Mallek Discovering His God Tier Powers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mallek finds out about an unusual game from an even more unusual source.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was really hard to write because it has been a decent while since I have thought of the actual game mechanics of Homestuck.

It was only out of curiosity that you accepted the chat request that night. You were also bored and tired and not making any progress on the code you were working on, so they made for an excellent distraction. The username, "alieninvasionofone," seemed funny to you and you couldn't work out what was going on in their profile picture. Some kind of image editing? You had to admit, you were kinda curious as to how they found you. You don't use social media at all and that line wasn't public. You always used vpns and encryptions when messaging people on it and you thought you had made a pretty airtight, secure communication system. Guess not. 

They immediately introduced themselves with black text that made you wonder if they were trying too hard to be edgy with the hemoanonymity or something. Maybe they were pulling this whole alien thing for attention or were a very committed roleplayer? Either way, they were very weirdly excited to talk to you "for the first time on your end." Whatever that meant. You asked them who they were and how they found you, thinking they were another hacker. They said they were an alien that you would befriend in the future and that you would tell them how to. You called bullshit on that. 

Thinking they were someone who must have caught you slipping somehow, you asked what the fuck they wanted before you found them and sent drones to their location. They said that that wouldn’t work because they were in some "semistable pocket of space and time" and were really sorry to have scared you. They said they needed you to help them help you get things moving. They said they were your friend, or at least would eventually be, and wanted to help you out. You tried to trace them to find them to find them, to figure out who was fucking with you. But they just, didn't seem to be anywhere? Which didn't make sense. What kind of help were they even trying to offer you? What did they have that they thought you wanted?

You almost severed the connection when they said they wanted to help you get out of your ordeals and escape the planet. You didn't talk about that shit with anyone, they especially shouldn't have known about it. But they said it was future you who told them. Maybe normally you would think you had a stalker, but they described what you apparently said to them in detail and it was way too accurate. It was starting to freak you out. You asked them what the fuck it is that they wanted you to do. They said you had to go spelunking. The fuck? 

They gave you the coordinates to what was supposed to be an ancient code that would help you get out of your ordeals. You asked what was the catch and they said there was no catch, and from their end you already did this and they were just helping you get started. The easy part would be finding it. The hard part would be turning it into an executable file that you would need to send to them and that they would send to their other friends. 

You asked why they didn't just do it on their own since they were apparently savvy enough to find you. They said they "weren't a hacker, sorry, information specialist" like you and had to follow your specific instructions to get this connection going. They knew your dumb joke? This felt weird. This felt very fucking weird. But they hadn't threatened you and you were running out of ideas. 

Eventually, despite all logic, you agreed. 

Finding some ancient code scratched into a cave wall that promised escape from the planet and not having to go through your ordeals seemed like a wild honkbeast chase from someone who wanted to fuck with you in the weirdest ways. You were hesitant to do it, but as much as you didn’t want to admit it, you were running out of time and you would try anything to try to get more of it. Even riding your rocketboard to the middle of nowhere because your future alien friend said you would find something there. 

After making it to the cavern and venturing in, you were able to see it for yourself and you were astounded. Lines and lines of code carved deeply into the cave walls, you traced a claw along the characters, their edges had rounded a bit over time, but it was still completely legible. You were maybe starting to rethink things. This code looked like it had been there for hundreds of sweeps and was written in a way that preceded the invention of husktops, but didn’t look too hard to make compatible. 

The thought that you even could was wild. Trying it at all was insane but you didn’t really have much to lose. You thought there was just about as good of a chance of the code you found actually coherently running as there there was you having some kind of last second breakthrough in controlling the drones. So nonexistent, but you were getting desperate and this was starting to intrigue you.

While you were working on it, the alien would message you from time to time to check up on you. They gave you some more information as to what this would all even do. You didn’t believe them at the time. Still, you liked video games and Alternia was already wild as hell, so it couldn't be too bad, if they, again, weren't completely insane and wasting your very limited time with this. 

It was kinda nice to have someone checking up on you though, especially when it was just chatting about dumb stuff, they were easy to talk to. You could see how you could become friends with them. If any of what they said actually made sense, you probably would already be. You tried to ask them about how they were even talking to you. 

Because from what you understand, they, the alien, were talking to you, past Mallek, because future you told them to and they were friends. But this was something future you told them to do since it already happened to him. And they agreed since from their perspective, future you had started talking to them around when they first started the game and future you had already gotten a lot of help from future them in the beginning and had to do it to complete some kind of time loop. Where and how the fuck did the original convergence occur? Meeting each other because you would meet each other sounded paradoxical as hell. The more they told you, the less you felt you understood. 

To be fair, they said they didn’t super get it either, which wasn’t super reassuring on your end. Time was apparently your domain and you would eventually understand it to the point of being able to pull this off. Also something about the inherent connection of serpents to time? You guess you can thank the future you for this pan-ache. Which is probably the most believable thing they’ve said.

When you were done, they seemed ecstatic and said that they would start organizing shit with the rest of their friends. They had apparently been planning something big for a while and you would eventually be helping them cause the events that would lead to you currently helping them? It didn’t make much sense, but you were used to it at that point. You didn't hear from them in awhile after that, even if it was mostly bullshit, you kinda missed hearing from them.

They messaged you one more time before they told you to run the file. They said that time flows weirdly in the medium, so when you enter it and finally start messaging them after you found your footing, it would be the beginning for them. So they wouldn’t know you at all. This left you a bit more distressed than you thought it would. Sure they caught you really off guard in the beginning, but they were pretty chill when they weren’t going into game mechanics. They even listened to you rant about stuff and you sent each other dumb shit. You had kinda grown to like this little weirdo and the idea of them not knowing who you were at all, you didn’t like it. 

They said that the game was going to start soon and that they hoped you were ready to make an alien friend in the future. You told them you already did and that you would see them on the other side. They said you absolutely would.

You had the file, and were ready to run it. You were nervous, but it was this or nothing. You ran it. 

When you finally did, that was when shit really popped off. 

And that led you to now. Once you were in the game though, you met up with their other friends who all seemed to have met them through pretty convoluted mechanics. With a large group, things were pretty hectic, but at least you had numbers on your side. You also found out you were one of three time players. You were all pretty different with one being a bronze rancher and the other being the actual fucking Marvus Xoloto, but despite your bickering, you were all pretty committed to getting shit done and not dying. Until now. 

You finally made it to your quest bed. A red slab of rock greeted you ominously and you felt sick. You had seen a few others rise through death, saw what they had become capable of. You knew you needed to too, it was just, you were terrified. You had spent so long on Alternia, being careful, covering your tracks, and limiting what you did. It was to escape culling. And now you just, you’re supposed to die? 

You had bonded with a few other trolls in the game, Diemen was even here and you two were cool, but you didn’t know if you had anyone you could necessarily call up because of your fear of death. You knew someone, you used to, but they didn’t know you now. You couldn’t message them the same way you used to. So you do the next best thing.

You send a friend request to alieninvasionofone.

Death did not come easily for you. But it did eventually. And after it did, you rose, more alive than ever before.

You floated, adorned in red robes and wings made for speed. You felt like you had been struck by lightning with you now being hyper aware of time. The past, present, and future, you could just dip in and take what you and others needed. It was all accessible to you now, yours for the taking. 

You were never going to run out of time again.

You got a notification. 

Your friend request had been accepted. 

You had a temporal loop to create.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell that I don't know anything about time loops or paradoxes?


	4. Day 4: Mallek working through his feeling for someone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> MSPA Reader wants to ask Mallek a question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good luck predicting this chat.

They had come over a few nights after visiting Galekh to hang out with you. Normally you two just chatted, enjoyed the silence, or played video games. Things were pretty chill tonight with the two of you hanging out on the couch and them catching you up on their very active social life and you with your coding progress. You knew they didn't understand all of what you were talking about, but they still were making an effort and were listening very attentively. It was pretty nice of them and you enjoyed just being able to talk to someone about it. 

You had just finished updating them on your work when you noticed they looked a bit hesitant to speak, now not meeting your eyes and preferring to look off to the side. They clearly had something to say and the pause in the conversation was growing uncomfortable. 

"what = up;" you kept your tone easy, trying not to look concerned. You knew they were pretty sympathetic and you didn't want them to feed off of your worry if something was already bothering them. 

"Nothing! I just wanted to thank you again for showing up at Galekh's place like that. I know you're a busy guy so that was really cool of you." They smiled, but they were still stiff, this was clearly not all they wanted to say and you wanted to know what it was.

"like i said; its != a big deal; i had some free time;" You definitely made some free time for them when they called. Like they weren't too far, but you did drop everything you were doing for them. I mean you were friends. Friends do that. 

They waited a bit before continuing on, "And I really appreciate it. You being fine with that and all of the other stuff. You've just been pretty easygoing about a lot of things in general and I know I say dumb shit all the time because of me being an alien and not getting Alternian stuff. Also just who I fundamentally am as a person." They chuckled a little at the end and were getting a bit more anxious, they were starting to play with their hair. 

You turned towards them on the couch. You wanted to put them at ease, but also really wanted to see where this was going, if you could. "i like who you = as a person;" you teased.

They seemed a bit reassured by this and they gave you the smallest smile. “Thanks. And I'm kinda hoping you still will if I ask you something? I mean, can I ask you something?" Their voice was getting higher at the end and they were finally looking at you again, looking sheepish, but hopeful. 

Oh. 

OH. 

They noticed you were flushed for them? You mean you did slip up and call them cute while they were soaked. And said you would do anything for them during a video call that another person fucking heard. Also, you met them and immediately gave them your sign? Okay, maybe that last one was a bit too obvious. 

You were being pretty clear, but you thought they were shy or this just wasn’t translating for them. It would be dumb to hold aliens to Alternian romance and didn’t know if they had anything similar, not that you would ever ask. You even wondered if they were trying to be polite about it since you two were friends, but it’s pretty clear when they’re uncomfortable. You weren't expecting this tonight or for them to just come out with it like this. Guess they were just full of surprises. 

"sure robobud; you know you can ask me anything;" you leaned towards them now, looking down at them softly. They looked up at you and while still tense, they seemed to calm down. 

"That's good, okay so," they took a deep breath and looked up at you now more determinedly. Your attention was solely on them now, wanting to hear what they wanted to say. 

"What did I say to Galekh that made him so uncomfortable?" 

What. 

"what;" 

So that did not go where you thought it was going. But they were pushing through, speaking rapidly before they lost their nerve. 

"Like how when you were tattooing him I said he was crossing something off of the bucket list and he just full body cringed. And then you calmed him down by saying something I didn't understand. So that meant something very different to you two than it did to me and I want to know what so I don't say something dumb like that again to someone." They were looking at you a bit more optimistically now but that didn't stop them from adding," again, only if you're okay with it."

Well, you did say anything. 

You didn't know that giving a bluebood a tattoo was going to result in the most uncomfortable conversation of your life with another person. The fact that this person was an alien who you were flushed for wasn't helping. They just didn't have the same cultural background meaning that you would have to go deeper into this than you would otherwise have to, not that you would ever even need to explain this to another troll. But still, you were their friend and it's probably better for them to be unaware and ask you these questions rather than someone who would just kick their ass. 

You guess it took you a bit to process that with how they were looking at you. "Are you okay with it? You seem to be having a hard time."

"yeah; sure; i = good;" 

"You were quiet for a little bit."

"i != was expecting you to say that;" 

"Yeah, I could tell." They paused and perked up a bit, "wait, what did you think I was going to say then?" 

"i != know; != that;" You weren't looking forward to getting into it, but they somehow managed to find the only topic of conversation that you wanted to talk about less than that. You consider for a moment, before just deciding to be direct with them.

"i mean you basically said he had a bucket list;" 

They looked at you inquisitively. "Doesn't everyone?" 

You just took a moment to take in the casual way that they just asked that. Either they were into some shit or this meant something wildly different for humans. You try again, hoping for the latter. 

"what does that phrase mean to you;"

"A list of things you want to do before you die." 

You took in a deep breath, pressing your palms together, and stared, "define things;" 

"Like big life goals? Like learning how to play an instrument, or how to speak a new language, maybe running a marathon or climbing a mountain. Maybe traveling or getting a tattoo. Things that are kind of experiences that are aspirational."

Oh okay then. 

"i get it; but why say it like that;" 

"It’s for before you kick the bucket." 

What the fuck. 

They saw your look and said, "It is a metaphor. It means to die. Like I'm not one hundred percent sure where it came from but yeah. It sounds weird to actually dissect it."

"i mean; you could get culled if you did that here;" 

At this they were confused, "why would that even matter?" 

"The drones != like that;" 

"Why would the drones even care?" 

It was at this point you realized that there was a much deeper lack of understanding than you had previously anticipated. Like you weren't expecting much, but this was still a lot. So you just kinda jumped into it and tried to explain the whole thing with drones and quads as best you could without turning cerulean. Luckily they had already seemed to have a pretty decent understanding of quads because of their other friends’ personal lives and knew a lot about the brooding caverns from one of their jade friends. It was more they never picked up on the connection between the two. 

Not that it mattered much since once they understood the implications of what they said, they were turning bright red, clearly embarrassed.

"I turned it into a sex thing. Oh poor Galekh." They covered their face with their hands and groaned. "I can't believe I turned it into a sex thing. Fuck, if you didn't play it off, I wouldn't be surprised if he just kicked me out of his hive then." You didn't tell them that that was probably the best case scenario since they were already mortified and things turned out okay for them anyways.

Trying to comfort them, you reply “i != worry about it too much; quad shit can get complicated for trolls; he would have gotten worked up about it somehow anyways; so it must be especially wild for an alien;”

“It was mostly just the introduction to them that was wild. The first time someone was trying to explain quadrants to me, it wasn't really an explanation of them so much as it was this indigo guy trying to convince me to be his matesprit since it would come with benefits, or anything else he could get. Yeah, so that was uh,” they mull over their next word carefully, “something."

"yeah; that = skeevy as fuck dude;" 

“But otherwise it’s mostly that there are more kinds here that focus on different parts of a relationship. Like auspitism I am still a bit fuzzy on, I get kismesitude now, I have a moirail, and matespritship is basically analogous to what romance for humans is.”

That last little bit of information caught your attention immediately. So they did have something equivalent. That was promising at least, the fact that it was even a possibility. There were no chances of anything happening tonight though, not with the turns that conversation took. You still had mental whiplash from that. 

It wasn’t hard for the two of you to slip back into the casual chatting that you had been doing before. It was just easy to talk to them. They started telling you some of the wilder antics that had been keeping them busy and most of it was hilarious if not moderately concerning. They had you laughing throughout and maybe you were imagining things, but you started to notice the way they would glance at you, how they smiled at you a little longer when you laughed, how it reached their eyes.

You were starting to feel a little bit better about your chances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting some lighter chapters after angstier ones is self-care.


	5. Day 5: Mallek Meets His Ancestor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting family is always so weird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ancestors are weird so I tried to keep him vague. There seem to be a few fandom threads as to what his ancestor would have been like though, like pirate, rebel, spy, smuggler. All we know is he got into some shit. Probably.

You had always thought that ancestors weren’t real, that they were just dumb stories that highbloods told each other to justify how hard they get to jerk off over themselves among themselves. Like it wasn’t enough that they’re whatever blood color they are, that they also came from some inherent greatness. That one time, another asshole had their sign and did some impressive shit so everyone, by extension, should really be impressed by them. They didn’t do anything, but did they really have to, since some dead fuck did all the work for them? Like you don’t have to reuse all signs eventually and don’t come from some nasty ass slurry in the mother grub.

You thought that until you played the game, which, while it was wild for so many reasons, good and bad, meeting dead people in your sleep was not one you were expecting. Everytime you thought that maybe you were getting closer to understanding the mechanics of everything, there was just some fresh hell to deal with. Sopor didn’t do shit for this, it only worked on fake subconscious nightmares, not the apparently real dead people whose dream bubbles you were passing through. You never got a lot of sleep in general and you don’t know how much sleep you actually need after god tiering, but now being encouraged to get some rest meant likely waking up in some random bubble with a stranger standing over you. So that was cool. 

Some of the other players were excited and wanted to meet their ancestors, some didn’t care, others were avoiding them. It wasn’t that you were avoiding yours, like you heard about him the same way everyone else was learning shit in the dream bubbles. Everyone talks and gossips, sure, but teals have nothing on the dead, who are bored out of their pans. They seemed to be interested in their descendants to see if whatever legacy they think they made was somehow preserved or that whatever dumb shit they did was forgotten or made up for. Mostly for their own egos, like anyone had thought of them in sweeps.

You heard about yours before you met him. That the last Adalov defected from the Condesce’s army back when it was still planetside. He apparently fucked off to become a pirate and joined the rebellion at some point. You aren’t sure when and you don’t really care. You didn’t know much about him personality wise but apparently he has a lot of tattoos and piercings too. That seemed to instantly have some of the other ancestors make the connection and invite them to monologue about their thoughts on him to you. Finding any rest while sleeping is basically impossible.

You thought this would be a good spot to actually find some peace and quiet. You guess he did too. You stood before him now, as tall as you could stand, but he was still massive compared to you. A fully grown adult. You came out to maybe his chest. His carapace had darkened and contrasted against the scars and tattoos that remained uncovered. He had piercings too, and messy hair that was longer than yours. He didn’t have visible eyes but you knew he was sizing you up. He looked amused to even see you here.

“Looking to be alone?” He derided you.

“yeah; i =;” You held eye contact, if you could even call it that, with him. He made no move to leave. He’s already dead so it isn’t like he has much to worry about. 

“What did you do to earn those?”

You flicked your wings out, “i died; how about yours;” If he was going to be an ass so were you.

“The piercings. What did you do to earn your piercings?”

“i wanted them; so i got them;”

“By doing what exactly? You’re barely gray enough to have earned one of them, but here you are with a whole face of them.”

Oh. It sounds like he was implying that back then someone had to do some cool shit to deserve them. He is probably thinking that since you already had so many, that you had reasons better than,”aesthetic.” You don’t think hearing that or “I was drunk and didn’t think it wouldn’t hurt that bad,” were what he was waiting for, but it isn’t like you were hoping to keep him around. 

“i did them myself because i liked them; it != that deep dude;”

He frowned and continued looking at you. If he was waiting for you to continue, he was just going to have to wait around until you woke up. 

Gesturing to himself, he points at an eyebrow piercing, “I got this one after I won my first naval battle. I sank over a dozen ships.” He points at an ear piercing, “This is got after I joined the rebellion, I stole from my old commander’s shipping vessels and even got to take his down.” He is grinning now, really seeming to enjoy that memory. 

Guess stealing shit and fucking with people is a shared trait. 

“i just stole using drones; it isnt too hard to intercept their shipments when you know what you = looking for; then you just reroute them and they will even deliver it for you; it != a big deal;” you say this casually, hoping he will get disappointed that you aren’t impressed and fuck off. This seemed to have a very different impact on him as his eyes widened.

“You got drones working for you?” He seems pleasantly surprised, slipping into a smile that seemed more genuine. 

“It != uncommon; plus you can get them delivering shit straight to your hive;” You guess that hacking the drones just wasn’t a thing during his time. “it makes remote payment easy too;”  
“You had them making deliveries.” He laughed and shook his head. “You made them yours?”

‘no; i never owned the drones; i couldnt get that far; plus it != like there are any more of them around;” You looked off, away from him, “it ended being pretty pointless;” 

You were still a little pissed you never were able to totally figure it out. You thought that having time powers would make up for it, and they were pretty cool. But they also let you know that there wasn’t a single timeline in which you ever owned the drones. It was still a sore spot for you. It bothered you and you guess it was apparent. 

He considered you, still bemused, but there was something else there, “You’re too alive to be speaking with so much finality.”

Yeah no, a shared sign isn’t going to give him the ability to act like he knows you. He didn’t even know that hacking was a thing until this conversation. “And too old to have ghosts nagging me;” 

He chuckled and began walking off, finally, “Still young enough to switch to something else. Find something new to fixate on.” He added, ”the ghost shouldn’t be the optimist.”

Despite yourself, you snickered at his comment. 

He looked back at you once more, “maybe even try to earn the next one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I picture Mallek's ancestor as the chill uncle who seems cool so you talk to him and learn he's actually wild as hell and don't get how he survived a few of his stories? Maybe.


	6. Day 6: MSPA Reader meeting trickster!Mallek for the first time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First time as in first meeting? Or first time as a trickster? Why not both?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more day. God I don't know how this got done. This was fun to write though.

God fucking damn it Mallek.

Play a game he said. You’ll have fun and make new friends he said. You’ll eventually meet them in person through a series of convoluted time paradoxes that simultaneously have and have not happened yet he said. It will be all good he said.

You know what he didn’t fucking say?

That at one point, he would turn into some candy coated asshole who would be terrorizing you the first time you ever met in person.

You knew that he was an “information specialist” and just generally enjoyed getting into shit he shouldn’t. And it was fine, he was having fun, you were having fun, doomed timelines were being averted. Future him would talk to current you and give you advice to repay future you for helping past him. You know, things that don’t really make sense, but your pursuit of friendship has barely even ever led you astray, so why worry about it? 

He even told you that when your sessions merged that you two would finally meet. He said that your present selves were about to meet and be experiencing the same time for the first time and you were so pumped to meet him in person. Apparently, the future two of you were chilling and hanging out together in the future while pinging past each others’ past selves and it sounded so nice. Just some friends helping each other become friends so that you could become friends and ensure that you became friends in the first place. 

That was the last you heard from future Mallek and you didn’t know if he didn’t tell you this because telling you would change your reactions and alter the timeline or if shit had just gone entirely off of the rails in this one.

You were finally able to reach current Mallek on your palmhusk and you knew you were excited to see him, as well as the rest of your friends too. He was excited too since he liked future you and figured present you would be pretty chill too. You hoped he would. You knew he would, since all of what hasn’t happened has happened already has so things will be fine. 

It was as things were about to coalesce that he said he thought he found something that would help with the game. That he poured through the code and that he thought he found a cheat that would help create a tool you guys could use to win. And maybe this was partially your fault for encouraging him, but you’re just an encouraging person in general and want your friends to do well. Especially when they are doing something that sounds cool and that they are passionate about, like hacking. You thought it would be beneficial to everybody. So you did.

You were starting to regret that. 

He said he was going to go alchemize it and would be over to see you in a bit and for you to hang out right where you were. You were excited to see whatever mystery hack this was. Then things just felt different. Like someone opened a pixy stick too close to you and you felt like you had to sneeze and everything just smelled like sugar and kind of burned.

You heard him before you saw him.

“SUP;”

You turned around and immediately squinted trying to shield your eyes from whatever that was. It wasn’t a bright light, it was just this nauseous burst of color and it just looked wrong. Everything clashed together in a way that simultaneously called attention to him and made you want to look away. Looking at him too long gave you a headache and you could have sworn that he didn’t have firm edges, that he was just, almost glitching?

“IT = GREAT TO FINALLY MEET YOU BUD;”

Oh hell no. This was not Mallek. You had seen his profile picture and this was not that. Like this dude looked like Lisa Frank personally beat his ass. Also, what is his volume? You could barely hear your own panicked thoughts. Maybe you could get him to calm down?

You hesitantly greet him and ask if he is feeling okay. He sounded a lot more mellow on Grype and you wanted to know if something happened while he was trying to make the tool.

“I = AM DOING GREAT; I HACKED THE GAME; AND EVERYTHING = GOING TO BE OKAY NOW;”

He sounded manic, like he could barely contain himself and you notice he was holding a massive swirly lollipop. This couldn’t be the tool, this was a joke. This has to be a joke. It is a joke that is super not funny to you and you start stepping away slowly from him. He floated towards you, seemingly unaware of your fear. 

“AW; WE = ALREADY FRIENDS; YOU =! NEED TO BE SHY; I = SO EXCITED TO MEET YOU;”

You let him know that you were happy to see him too, but maybe you two should hold off on talking until he was feeling better. 

“WHAT; I = SO MUCH BETTER NOW; I USED TO BE FREAKING OUT ABOUT MY ORDEALS; THEN I WAS STRESSED ABOUT THE GAME; AND THIS SWEET CHEAT SOLVED EVERYTHING;”

Oh wow. Yeah. You are glad he is feeling better. He did a good amount of that too, it didn’t do everything. Like he helped turn it into an executable file in the first place and he had even opened up about his anxieties to you. He shouldn't give it all the credit. You were all just friends helping friends. And maybe he should put that down and take a deep breath.

“YOUVE ALWAYS BEEN A REALLY HELPFUL FRIEND; WE GOT THE GAME BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME WHERE IT WAS; AND WE HAVE THIS BECAUSE I FOUND IT; NOW I = PUMPED THAT I CAN HELP YOU;”

Oh he really doesn’t have to do that, you are good. You are so good. You didn’t do it for a reward you just wanted to hang out with your friends and be happy and you two were already doing that so really there is no need t-

“BUT YOU DID THIS BECAUSE YOU WERE LONELY; YOU WERENT HAPPY;”

He is floating closer to you and you try to say you were happy now. You don’t have to bring that up. 

He is now on the ground slowly walking towards you and this was somehow the most scared you had ever been in the game. 

“DONT YOU WANT TO ALWAYS BE HAPPY; DONT YOU THINK IT WOULD COOL TO NOT WORRY ANYMORE ABOUT ANYTHING”

No, you think that not being happy all the time makes it easier to relate to others having a hard time. Like using candy to pretend that nothing is wrong.

“I WASNT HAPPY SINCE I DIDNT HAVE ANY CONTROL OF MY LIFE ON ALTERNIA; YOU GOT ME OUT; NOW WITH THIS I = COMPLETELY IN CONTROL; I OWN THE GAME; I CAN DO WHAT I WANT WHENEVER I WANT TO; YOU CAN TOO;”

He didn’t look like a guy like a guy in control. It seemed like he got worried he was going to lose control again and did something maybe not smart. You know how much he likes being able to do his own thing and you could understand. 

“DONT BE LAME; THIS = SO MUCH BETTER THAN BEING STRESSED ALL THE TIME; PLUS WITH THIS YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TOO; WERE BUDS; I WANT YOU TO GET IN ON THIS WITH ME;”

What you really want is for him to back the fuck up because he is really getting in your personal space and you’re getting super uncomfortable. 

“COME ON; BE HAPPY WITH ME;”

Whoa. Wait. What?

“I ALREADY DID ALL OF THE CODING; AND I != HAVE ANY FUTURE KNOWLEDGE TO HELP YOU WITH ANYMORE; WITH THIS WE CAN STILL HANG OUT;”

You didn’t talk to him just because you thought he was useful, you already liked him! He doesn’t need to do shit like this for you to want to hang out with him. 

This was apparently the wrong thing to say, as it somehow made his already huge grin impossibly wider. Yeah, you weren’t getting out of this one.

Before your sugar rush started, your last coherent thought was that you wondered if this happening is dooming the timeline, or ensuring its’ success.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so, trickster mode gives a megaphone to your impulses and fears so for this I theorized that in a game, he might need to feel useful. With all of MSPA's other cool friends, he might be anxious that if he isn't bringing anything to the table anymore, why see him? Also, finding a game breaking power up for someone who is desperate for control? Yeah. Not great.


	7. Day 7: Free Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the Free Day I did a commission of remixing how Mallek and MSPA Reader could have met based off of @theartisticapparition oc in exchange for them drawing my fantrolls for my fic Nobody Knows since I was doing the two concurrently. It was wonderful and you can see them here!
> 
> https://heuristicallyinclined.tumblr.com/post/612345666041184256/commission-trade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was done as a trade with @theartisticapparition
> 
> So I finished this mostly on time, I just got caught up in the craziness of life and just never posted it. Here it is though. I can now say I offcially completed all the writing prompts.

The last thing you remember doing on Earth was going to pick up some groceries. There wasn’t anything remarkable about that day. You went to art school and just wrapped up with class and were trying to hit that sweet spot in the day between the shopping times of stay at home moms and and people getting off of work. You tossed your bag in the passenger seat of your van and drove off. You were paying attention, you swear. You know you were. It’s just that some white cat seemingly came out of nowhere and you swerved to not hit it, but it somehow hit you? You lost consciousness when you crashed and when you woke up, under some structure, you were no longer on Earth. You briefly thought you died and went to hell, on account of all of the horned creatures, but that was ridiculous. You just knew they just needed a friend, a friend like you. You implicitly knew that. And it was with that knowledge in mind that you left the wreckage of your vehicle, grabbed your bag, and walked in the direction of the nearest city. You had no time to waste when there were friends to be made and make friends you did.

Still, living on Alternia was hard, but you made it work. 

You even made a few friends who were also artists. They used different mediums than you, but you were definitely open to new things, especially on a new planet. It could be a fun way to bond with them even. You were willing to try anything once!

That is until you found out how they got pigment for them.

Yeah. 

No.

You think were just going to stick with digital. The stuff in your bag somehow survived and as long as Kuprum got to mock your alien tech, he seemed more than happy to charge it.

You actually got the idea of getting back into art from one of your friends. You had finished reading the first volume of soldier purrbeasts, with only moderate difficulty, might you add. It being written for younger trolls was actually really helpful for you getting better at reading Alternian. Plus, Wanshi seemed ecstatic that someone else was taking her interests seriously, so you had gone to the brooding caverns with bag in hand to return her copy and get a new one. On the way in, you got intercepted by Karako, who was very excited to tell you about his latest exploits outside of the caverns, the ones he couldn't tell Bronya. But since the two of you had kinda become adventure buddies, you got to hear everything. You were as touched as you were deeply concerned. 

You made it to her room and she was happy to see you and even happier when you told her why. She took the book back from you and asked you your opinion on everything she could think of while she was getting you the second book. You took this time to look around her room for the first time. There were books everywhere. Some of which were clearly school hive books, but the others were mostly different soldier purrbeast books. She had posters of the covers and characters on her walls and there were even some of her drawings. You looked at them closely. It appears to be her oc mostly, but a few other drawings make you think that she has made purrbeasts representing the other jades. A smaller looking purrbeast with stripes shows that Karako got in on it too.

She notices you admiring them and starts to go into them, explaining their intricate backstories and relations to each other. She was also letting you know what the most important parts to work out were. Despite your lame last rping attempt with her, she seems to really want you to try again with her. It was really endearing to see how into it she was getting. You remember yourself and your old interests, the ocs that will never see the light of day again, but definitely made you into a better artist. Karako chimes in with info about his oc too and apparently a few of the drawings on the walls are of the two of them together. She gave you the book and you smiled at her. You offered to draw their ocs as thanks. You know you would have died if anyone older than you wanted to do that for you when you were her age. It looks like the same is holding true for her, by the look she's giving you. As she tackle hugs you. Karako joins in too and takes a drawing off of the wall for reference. 

Back at home, and by home, you mean your van that you slipped a few necessities into the back of and dangerous old tower looming over it. You pulled out your tablet and got to work. You hadn't really drawn much since you came to Alternia. But with the whole, "learning about a hostile alien world" and "repeatedly narrowly escaping with your life in the pursuit of friendship" thing you've had going on recently, you just didn't have time. You certainly weren't lonely anymore, not with all the activities with your friends and your attempts to make new ones. You just, didn't really have as much of a reason to pursue it you guess, until now. Now, you can actually pursue your hobbies again without feeling overwhelmed by it feeling futile because of how you're walking cullbait. You have really come a long way here and that feeling carried you through your efforts. 

Walking back to the caverns later, you were feeling pretty good about it. The purrbeasts looked feral and majestic, Wanshi's had intelligent eyes and Karako's had fluff sticking up every which way. You even added a background from the book you read. It was nice to be able to get into something you knew how to do, especially for friendship reasons. You didn't realize how much you missed it. Walking by Wanshi's door, you heard serious tones and honking, guess you caught them in the middle of rping. You knocked and they quieted immediately, you heard shuffling before the door cracked open slightly and Wanshi peered up hesitantly. Upon seeing it was you, she relaxed.

[]It's okay Karako. It's just the alien.[]

You looked at her bemusedly and asked who else she was expecting.

[]Sometimes When We get too loud, Lynera comes over to yell at us to quiet doWn and to stop distracting the other jades.[]" She pouts at this statement before realizing, "[]Wait, did you already finish the other book or?[]" Her eyes widened and you smiled. "[]You finished it? Wait, both? You really did it?[] She was practically vibrating when you told her you did. She pulled you into her room and the two of them sat on either side of you as you pulled out your laptop. 

Karako honked as you were pulling it up, asking if that was alien technology. When you confirmed, he carefully ran a claw along the side of your laptop before pulling back to honk that it looked weird. Wanshi agreed. Your device definitely didn't have enough legs sticking off of it to pass off as Alternian tech. When the image opened, they stopped talking about how weird your stuff looked and instead went silent for a second, before both of them burst out in excitement. They were both talking and honking over each other and it was a bit hard to understand them but you got the sense that they were pretty excited. You were glad they liked it so much. Alternia has been pretty rough for you, so you can't imagine having to grow up here, so you felt really good doing it, especially for your young friends. 

You sent her a copy of it on chittr and watched horrified, as an insectoid device on her desk spat something out shortly. Paper? Oh thank god, it was just a printer. She grabs it and starts to hang it next to her own drawings, you had made it to a place of honor. Nice. 

"[]Thank you so much! It looks really good![] You I didn't knoW you did soldier purrbeast commissions! Why didn't you say something before?[]" She says this all rapid fire, still pumped. 

You let her know this was your first time doing anything soldier purrbeasts related but you had done commissions before on your planet. This was just your first time doing something art related again on Alternia. 

"[]For our ocs? uwu[]" She presses her hands to her face, touched. Karako asks you why you don't do more of them.

You didn't really know, like you knew people did commissions here, but you didn't really think to start up again with everything else that had happened. 

"[]Well, I think you should. You're good.[]"

Yeah?

She looks at you conspiratorially, before smiling, "[]Fuck yeah![]" 

Maybe you should start the fuck up again!

You hear a profane honk in agreement.

Apparently so did Lynera.

__________

While she wasn't happy, Lynera couldn't stay mad at you for long and after escaping a lecture on the importance of not corrupting the youths, you used the chittr account Cirava made for you, you advertised you would start taking commissions. You posted some examples and their corresponding prices. You had enough of a following interested in your antics, that playing up the alien factor would help. People here should like the novelty of it, right? You mean, some people probably would think it was a scam or bullshit, but maybe, if you got lucky, you could get even enough of a following to try opening a Hatereon account.

You could always use more caegars. Being Tagora's partner meant you got paid something, but after deductions from tax and your debt payments to him, it wasn't a huge amount or anything. You would probably have stronger feelings about that if you actually were at all actually qualified to be assisting him in providing legal advice in the first place, which, let's face it, you were not. So you couldn't really complain. You were starting to wonder if this was a just deeply convoluted way of him making sure you had enough money to eat. So, you would like to think he would be proud that you found a new way to make money, playing up your assets and up-charging for the shock value. 

It was with that that a few requests came in. There was also a decent amount of commentary and ridicule on how stupid they were to fall for it in the first place. But if anything, it was just free exposure. None of what they said even came close to upsetting you as much as just some regular nightly things that happened here. And plus, you really liked being able to slip back into something familiar again. You never really felt like you had too much power over your life on Earth, but ending up on Alternia worsened it a lot. So just being able to turn on your tablet and immediately lose your pen, gave you back a sense of control that you missed. 

Plus you were always able to find it again.

You eventually got a greater online presence due to this and it was attracting all kinds of attention from different people. It was through this attention that you were getting that you met Mallek. 

Your van was towards the outskirts of town and you would often sit in the back with the doors open, legs hanging off the edge of it while working. Nobody other than Charun really passed by it. So having a limo pull up and stop in front of it while you were working immediately put you on edge. You saved your work and pulled your tablet closer to you and slowly got out. They had already seen you since they stopped, so you might really need to make a good first impression. A bronze troll you had never never seen before popped out and headed straight towards you and you tried to put some distance in between you two when a familiar voice piped up, having also emerged from the vehicle. 

“(| oh hey i didnt know you lived here |)”

You whipped your head over and and saw Diemen. The other troll took this as a chance to grab you and you held firm to your tablet. He didn’t seem to react much other than brief surprise that you two knew each other.

You greet Diemen warmly, like you didn’t have a stranger holding you. You ask why he didn’t let you know he wanted to visit with some friends. You would have cleaned up a bit and picked him up an oblong meat product. 

He visibly cheers when you recognize him. “(| aw you remembered me |) (| but no this isnt a visit |)”

Oh really? That was unfortunate. What would this be if not a fun, friendly visit?

You don’t know if you want the answer.

“(| some guy i work for was looking for a robot |) (| have you seen one around your uh |),” he pauses and looks around a bit, “(| is this your hive man |).”

Yeah, sort of. You crashed here with the alien scuttlebuggy behind you, sometimes you chill in the structure above since it's abandoned and it has a nice view. 

The guy holding you loosens his grip a bit and looks down at you, baffled at the casual conversation occurring. 

"(| that's cool i guess i like roughing it a bit more |) (| i have a pretty sweet bush ive been chilling in |)"

Neat. Yeah, you aren’t that hardcore. Plus, you’re pretty sure trolls are hardier than you are anyways.

“(| treyaf thats the alien friend i told you about |) (| they are great at finding Sweet Meats in the sewer |),” he adds that last part in especially proudly. 

While you are flattered that he talks about you, and calls you his friend, you don’t know what to do with the contents of that statement and don't know how to respond to that other than nodding up a Treyaf who has now let go of you and is looking at you strangely. Luckily, you don't have to since a third person exits the limo. 

A heavily pierced cerulean emerges and surveys the three of you, really trying to take whatever the hell is happening here in. He then turns towards you and smiles, looking you over.

“nice work; you guys found the robot;”

What robot?

He looks at you oddly, “youre a robot;”

No?

“(| yeah mallek theyre an alien |) (| i saw them after they crashed and everything |).”

You almost chuckle at the way he says this wild statement so matter of factly. 

His face returns to that of confusion. “how = you an alien; how havent the drones culled you yet;” 

“(| i know right |)”

You aren’t even offended by the disbelief at your existence, you had gotten it plenty of times before by others, and sometimes even yourself. Still you’d like to think that you’ve gotten good at dodging them and their attempts. 

You let him know that you are living proof that you have gotten good at not dying. 

He still looks stunned, maybe even a bit disheartened. “you = an alien;” 

“(| cant you tell by their weird alien tech dude |)”

At this mention he focuses on your tablet, which you still were holding close to you, and glances over at your van. Some stuff was still visible with the back door being open, namely your laptop. His excitement seemed to return. 

“they have alien tech here; nice;” his lazy grin returned full force. “it makes total sense now;”

You have no idea what made sense and were pretty lost. But he looked glad to see you again and really, how often does a potential new friend come to you? You would be a fool to waste this opportunity. You ask if he wanted to take a closer look at them, since it's probably the next best thing to you being a robot you guess. 

His easy smile gets a bit bigger, you think it suits him. “hell yeah; i want to see some alien shit; grab it and i can get a better look at it over at my place;”

Wait, right now?

“yeah;” the other two reenter the limo and Mallek gestures at you. Well, you aren’t going to miss this opportunity. You grab your shit and enter, hoping that this isn’t one of your worse life choices. Eh, probably not.

When you get in, Mallek starts fucking around on his palmhusk and you and Diemen catch up on what you’ve been up to. Mallek looks up from time to time when you say something particularly wild and gives you a look and occasionally chuckles. He has this cool guy thing down, so you hope that these stories are making you look like a cool guy too, instead of some loser going from one disaster to the next. Which you aren’t. Most nights anyways. 

You get to his place and say bye to Diemen. Mallek offers him a place to stay and you think that’s nice of him. You also more importantly wonder if Alternia has a real estate market. Don’t drones build hives here? Can people have a few? Is that allowed? Like if you’re rich enough, no laws apply on any planet, but still. You are lost in thought when Mallek nudges you and leads you to his apartment. God, what a mess. You don’t even have the time to fully take it in when he leads you to another room. This one is marginally less gross, but significantly more clutter. You don’t just think that since you have unwittingly become a minimalist. He sits at his desk and you follow behind him, sitting down and opening your bag. 

You open up your laptop and log in. He clears a spot on his desk for it and looks it over.

“this looks weird as hell;” he says this with no malice, and he starts looking through cables, trying to see if one will fit. He appears to be struggling to find one so you offer to help, you start digging through the wires. A white one appears to be less tangled with the rest, but when you touch it, it moves away from you. Oh God. 

Turning around, you are faced with a huge ass snake, Mallek’s lusus. You offer it a weak hello, hoping he isn’t mad you touched him. He looks you over and Mallek, noticing your concern, offers, “he = pretty chill; he probably just wanted to get a better look at you;” His lusus doesn’t look aggressive and stares at you a bit more, before slithering up the couch, apparently satisfied.

None of the wires end up working and Mallek’s attempts to connect wirelessly don’t work. His frustration is quickly growing apparent, and you wonder if he could even read English if he connected. Like you aren’t a tech person, and maybe somethings go together, but you think these operate in two very different ways. Especially with how organic Alternian tech is, Earth tech is fully inorganic so this can’t be going super well. It clearly isn’t, as he leans back in his desk chair and huffs, clearly annoyed.

“so this isnt working; i dont think any of my shit = compatible;” he glances over at you and gives you a weary smile. “any chance you can just tell me how you = doing it;”

Doing what?

“controlling the drones; at least enough not to kill you; like you have to have some kind of program you = using to make them do what you want;”

You let Mallek know, that you don’t have and have never had a program like that. You’re sorry about it, but it has been luck and a lot of running that has kept you alive. You aren’t a hacker like him.

“i prefer to be called an information specialist;” he says this with a small smile as you raise an eyebrow at him. You chuckle and this seems to raise his spirits a bit with his smile getting wider. You begin to ask why he wanted something like that in the first place when his palmhusk rang. He groans and lets it ring until it goes to voicemail. He rolls his chair to face you, “come on; i know a quieter place to talk;” and you follow him into an elevator. He deflates as you enter and you feel bad for him and wonder what he has going on. You feel a friendly heart to heart coming on. And you get comfy with an alien in a sewer. As one does. As you do, at least. This isn’t your first time chilling in a sewer with an alien. 

The two of you sat down and he began to unload on you. That whole night was pretty weird for him, with him thinking you were a robot. He thought that your chittr was like a learning AI or something, figuring out what people wanted and producing images for them. Then, you being an alien wasn’t as promising and then he was hoping that you had found a way to control the drones using some kind of alien tech. You tried to cheer him up by letting him know that he would probably be killing it on your planet since there wasn’t any biological component to technology so no one was just more inclined to becoming a hac-, information specialist. He eased a bit and told you about his anxieties and worries about the future, it didn’t really matter much how things could be elsewhere if he was just going to be here. Until he wasn’t. Shit just seemed bleak with some never ending space war. A good amount of your chat with him was just a continuous "bruh," moment and you just didn’t know what to do to help him, you didn’t really think you could do much for him other than just listen. 

It turns out property damage is a great subject changer for when you don’t know what to do, as you two went for a surprise swim, but it was all good now. You became friends. All water under the bridge, or sub sub basement sewer system. You know what, you never actually figured out what that was called. Does it have a name? 

Anyways, he called you cute and gave you his hoodie, so all in all, worth it. Plus, him blushing and having a mild freak out was endearing. It was nice to get a break from being the one immediately getting embarrassed over something you said. Despite that, the two of you became close. His chill nature meshed well with yours and you think he really enjoyed having someone to talk to. You liked having someone you felt safe around, that you could fully relax with. The fact that you thought he was cute too didn’t hurt.

__________

You were with him now at his hive. You had been finding yourself there much more often as time went on. He was working at his computer, his lusus was curled up under a heat lamp, and you were just on the couch with your tablet. You liked being able to just work quietly in his silent company. Every now and then one of you would break the silence with a curse when something didn't go the way you wanted and his lusus would raise his head, peeking up and flicking his tongue out to see if there was actually wrong before returning back to his coil beneath the lamp. You didn't think that would find a giant parental snake to be cute, but you also didn't think you would end up on an alien planet. Your life is just full of surprises.

You had a decent amount of commissions that had been keeping you busy and you enjoyed the renewed sense of purpose you had. By some miracle, you had caught up on them all. It was weird to just have nothing to do between your side jobs and social life, but here you were. Huh. 

What did you even want to draw? Your commissions had been all over the places with some people wanting ocs or random characters drawn. You got a decent amount of people who got random doodles from you just to say they had art done by an alien. Those didn't pay too much, but they also didn't take too long. Plus, it isn't like you were paying rent anywhere. Maybe some practice would do you good. You had a harder time than you'd like to admit drawing trolls. Even with all of the friends you had, it was still a challenge. 

At first, they look deceptively human. Same general shape and most of them had similar proportions. But it was more in the smaller features where they would trip you up. There was a certain level of sharpness to them that just wasn't found in humans. In their claws, and fangs, and horns. But to just draw pointier humans wasn't correct either, because even if they were more rigid and less flexible, they did have some curvature to them, just not how you expected it. They had more muscles, and some of them were similar to those of humans, others just seemed shaped wrong to you or maybe put too high or low. They were somewhere in the middle but not really, because at times it felt like another category entirely. As much as you hate to put it this way, they were just very alien to you. Maybe it was fitting.

You didn't really have any chances to stare at a single troll to try to take it all in, even with your friends because that would be weird. You didn't like the way some, well, most people here looked at you and you didn't want to be that guy. Plus, you didn't want to dedicate a hang out to just observing someone, you had other things that you wanted to do with them. People watching would probably be a dangerous sport here and you were not looking to get your ass kicked for being a creep with a staring problem. Though right now neither of you were doing anything that required much movement and you knew for a fact that he could stay like that for hours, which was mildly concerning, but now potentially very useful. The couch gave you a good angle to look over at his profile and the only thing really moving were his hands. When he gets into the zone like this, very little will distract him or cause him to move. Still you didn't just want to do it without asking, that could be seen as kinda creepy, like you were studying him or something. So you get his attention.

"yeah bud;" he says, not turning away from his work. 

So you caught up on your commissions.

"nice;"

And you wanted to practice drawing trolls. You had a feeling he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. You wanted to know if he was okay with you drawing him.

"damn; you dont think i = close to a breakthrough;"

Is he?

"no;" He chuckles at this admission. "do i have to do anything;"

Nope. You're asking him since he is already doing what you need him to do perfectly.

"cool; go for it;" he continues typing for a bit before adding, "i want to see it when you = done;"

Wow, no pressure Mallek.

He smirks and finally looks over at you, "consider it my modeling fee;" 

You laugh at this.

Okay, fine.

He turns back around and resumes working. You do feel some pressure, like you knew people seemed to like your stuff, but what if that was only because they were following you? If your stuff was already to their tastes? You didn't want to draw him and have him think you thought he was ugly or something, you didn't. You were since a little bit iffy on what trolls considered attractive anyways so it wasn't like you knew what to play up or down. If you're being honest, you don't really think he will care much though. You couldn't see much more than him chuckling, he was pretty easy going like that. So you begin.

You make notes of proportions which isn’t easy with how he is sitting in his desk chair. You think he has kind of a round face for a highblood. Remele does too, but she was just also smaller and more rounded in general. He is taller and lankier, more angled. You think you noticed that the higher up the spectrum you go, the bigger and more exaggerated sizes and angles become compared to lowbloods. Which were still way pointer than humans. He swallows and you notice the way his neck muscles move. It is similar to humans, but they seem to have more, maybe for additional protection around weak spots. He keeps his fingers curled as he types with his knuckles instead of his claws, something which you once tried to copy and then never again. Troll claws are thicker and go out farther before they start to curl than human nails, so you guess it's harder to get more precision. You don't know how they did it. His are painted black and chipping a bit, maybe he had been working on something recently. The light from his monitor makes his eye bags seem more exaggerated, it highlights their sunkenness, contrasting with the rest of his face. His glasses don’t come close to hiding them. You continue like this for a while, before you notice something. Sometime, over the course of his work, he stuck his tongue out, up until about his piercing. You add that in. There is no way you aren’t including that. 

You finish up your sketch of him and just start doing troll proportions in general when you hear him get up and stretch. Do troll joints normally pop like that? You can’t tell. Either way, that probably wasn’t great for him. He sat down next to you on the couch and eyed you. 

“so;”

Yeah?

He scoots closer to you, “how = my modeling career going;”

You snicker and nudge his ribs as he gets closer and let him know he may want to stick to being an information specialist.

He laughs, “damn; after all my hard work; that = harsh dude;” He relaxes and adds, “i do actually want to see it;”

You let him know that isn’t what is open right now and that you would pull it up in a second,you just wanted to wrap one more thing up. He glances over your anatomy practice and you catch him glancing down at his fronds. Yeah, those are the most annoying part for you to draw on humans, trolls have slightly different proportions and you’re trying not to make pointy humans or weirdly proportioned trolls. 

“do i look like a pointy human to you;”

You think he looks like he could use more sleep. His exhaustion transcends species.

As he bumps you and puts an arm on your shoulder, you pull up the sketch you made of him, bent over his desk on his computer, glasses on, tongue out. He rests his head on yours as he gets a better look at it. You’ve seen him like this plenty of times so it was nice to have recorded it. Especially since you had a feeling he would take issue with your favorite part. You grin, knowing what he was about to say.

“ i != do that with my tongue;”

He absolutely does. Almost every time he works for over an hour. Now you even have proof of it. 

“you could have just added that in;”

Why do that?

“to try to make me look like a dork;”

You let him know that you don’t have to try, dramatically swooning against him.

His eyes widened and you realize getting this close to him was a tactical error. “wow;” he ruffles your hair and the coldness of his hands still takes you off guard and you try to jerk away from him. “wow;” The mock disappointment in his tone doesn’t come close to matching the smile on his face. 

You swat his hands back with little success. Damn, his weird ass alien strength. “my guy; did you come here to roast me in my own hive;”

You come here, full of artistic integrity a-

He lets up and smirks down at you, “= that what you want to call it;”

Artistic integrity. 

He rolls his eyes.

And all you do is capture his true essence, a cute dork, and this is the thanks you get? You teasingly smile up at him and when his face no longer matches yours do you replay what you just said in your mind. Repeatedly.

Oh. 

Well, fuck.

The two of you remain in silence as you internally start stretching in preparation for the mental gymnastics you’re going to have to pull to convince him that what you just said means something totally different where you’re from. The longer this silence continues however, the less likely he is going to believe it.

He breaks the silence and appears to take mercy on you by sassing you back, “damn; you = right; i != do deserve it;” he smiles at you with a softness you hope wasn’t just wishful thinking on your part. 

Maybe the him showing up to your hive with some guys he hired to abduct you had something to do with it. 

You start to get off of him, but still remain on the couch, legs on top of his.

“say what you want; i still think that went well;”

Looking at him, smiling easily at you, you also can’t help but admit that you’re happy with how things turned out too.

But wouldn’t it have been funny if you pretended to be a robot?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Belated Mallek Week!

**Author's Note:**

> I am still working on my other fic, but if you read that and thought I wouldn't participate in this, then you are very wrong.


End file.
